Hairstyles and Updos for the Bridesmaids

Being a bridesmaid in an LDS wedding is a lot of fun: you’ll be able to dress up and enjoy yourself as a part of a beautiful wedding day that you didn’t have to painstakingly plan yourself! Aside from helping the bride with whatever she asks you to, your main concern as far as the wedding goes is just to look your best. Have you given thought yet to what you’ll be doing with your hair?

First thing is first: communicate with the bride. Obviously the bride chooses matching dresses and in most cases matching shoes for her entourage, but how she wants to handle bridesmaids’ hairstyles is usually a matter of personal preference.

Scenario #1: The Micromanager Bride

If she is really a planner or just likes symmetry and order a lot, the bride may want every bridesmaid to have identical hairstyles. In this case, she’ll probably book appointments for all bridesmaids to get their hair done the morning of the wedding at the same salon.

If this is the case, ask if she needs help making the arrangements and find out who will be paying for it – is it the bride’s treat? Is each bridesmaid responsible for paying her own way? Or will it be a combination of both bride and bridesmaids sharing the expense?

Scenario #2: The Flexible Within Limits Bride

With the different lengths and colors of hair in their wedding party, some brides may realize that it’s not possible to have everyone wearing an identical hairstyle on their wedding day.

It’s much more common for brides to give bridesmaids freedom to choose their own hairstyle within the parameters they set. For example, the bride may let you do whatever you want, as long as it’s an updo of some sort or as long as you use a specific hair accessory she provides.

This provides both structure and flexibility, and works out best for most brides (and their bridesmaids!) Just make sure you understand clearly what the bride is saying. Unless she specifies otherwise, you’ll be responsible for making and paying for your own arrangements.

Scenario #3: The Do-As-You-Will Bride

As is sometimes the case with informal weddings or cases where the bride is just too burnt-out to plan another detail, some brides don’t provide any guidance on bridesmaids hairstyles.

Bridesmaids can enjoy the freedom of doing whatever they want, but make sure that you run your ideas for a hairstyle by the bride just to make sure that you are on the same page before showing up on the wedding day.

As with any formal event that will forever live in photographs, avoid doing anything drastic to your hair in the days and weeks leading up to the wedding. When you color, cut, perm, or straighten your hair just before the wedding, you run a couple of risks. Not only might the new style turn out to be a passing whim (leaving you and everyone else a few years later to wonder just who that bridesmaid in the pictures could possibly be,) but the damage done by an ugly accident while perming or dyeing may not be entirely fixable.

Congratulations on being asked to be a bridesmaid at your friend or relative’s LDS wedding. As long as everyone understands who is paying for what and there is open communication with the bride about her expectations for her bridesmaid’s hair, you can expect to have a wonderful time.

♥ Jenny Evans
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